Better Angels
by salanderjade
Summary: "We are not enemies, but friends. We must not be enemies. Though passion may have strained, it must not break our bonds of affection. The mystic chords of memory will swell when again touched, as surely they will be, by the better angels of our nature." quote by Abraham Lincoln *cover courtesy of Ro Nordman
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1: Better Angels

Eleven years earlier:

"Once again, we return to the scene of the horrible accident that has claimed the lives of five people. The two car accident turned deadly this afternoon when the gas tank ruptured on one of the vehicles consuming most of the car instantly. The two occupants have been identified as Finnick and Annie Odair. It's unclear at this time what caused the couple to lose control of their car and veer into oncoming traffic. They collided with a van carrying the Everdeen family of Hunter's Bluff. The parents were killed on impact. The youngest, Primrose, died of her injuries on route to the hospital. The eldest, Katniss, is listed in critical condition at Panem General. We've been informed that she has some severe burns and suffers from smoke inhalation. We'll pass along further details as they become available."

Present day:

The alarm beeped just at the edge of awareness. Katniss didn't register the noise at first. She tuned it out, reaching to hit the snooze button on her clock, hoping for just a few minutes more. Her finger connected with the button but the insistent summons persisted. She cracked an eye open and peered blearily at the offending object. It gleamed in the darkened depths of her bedroom, suspiciously silent.

Her head lifted from the pillow as she looked around warily, searching for the source of the annoying whine. Her eyes gradually focused, senses alert for the slightest hint that something was amiss. The acrid scent of smoke was her first clue. The second was unaccustomed warmth in the room despite the faint drone of the air conditioner. Her braid clung damply to the back of her neck and she could feel rivulets of sweat trickling down the valley between her breasts. Her body seemed to grasp the situation before her mind put it together because she was moving even as realization set in. She knew what she would find before she got there but prayed that she was wrong. The door was just this side of hot and smoke curled its thin, gray fingers under the edges as if seeking her out.

She cursed softly, backing away from the door on all fours. Dammit, she hated fire. Despised it with a passion. She felt panic set in, freezing her mind and leaching strength from her quaking limbs. She tried to push it aside but the memories fought back with a vengeance. Screaming for her parents, watching Prim's cornflower blue eyes haze over with pain and tears. Even now, she could still hear her sister's moans and smell the sharp tang of gasoline mixed with hot oil and burning rubber. She refused to let it end like this. Not this time.

The smoke eddied in, thickening the air around her. She went to the bathroom, dampened a few towels and stuffed them into the gap beneath the door. She then went to her dresser and pulled out a clean t-shirt and sweatpants and hurriedly slipped them on. Her eyes surveyed the room, looking for a way out. The window was her first thought but she quickly dismissed it. She was on the twelfth floor and there wasn't a ladder or fire escape. The only one was off the living room window. She knew from the amount of heat emanating through the door and the smoke that the fire was close. There might not be a clear path. She had to find another way.

A low roar and the crackling of flames reached her ears. "Dammit," she breathed. "I won't die here. I won't." She looked frantically around the small room, illuminated only by the faint gleam of a nightlight burning in an outlet close to the floor. "There has to be a way."

She made one last hasty trip around the room, her mind working frantically as she came again to the door separating her from the rest of the apartment. That was it then, her only hope. She grabbed up the soaked towels and draped them around her shoulders and over her head. She stopped only to grab a thin chain from which hung a dull, dented locket. It was the last part she had of her family and she refused to leave it behind. She stuffed it in her pocket and carefully swung the door open. Sinking to her haunches, she crab-walked down the hall and into the smoke-shrouded living room.

The heat multiplied by tenfold, the smoke thick and heavy as it billowed in. She could make out a faint orange glow flickering and dancing in the distance. Muffled shouts and thumps could be heard but she dismissed them. They were too far away to help her now. She pulled the damp cloth over her mouth and nose and dropped to her stomach, slithering like a snake as she crossed the room. Her fingers found the wall before her burning, tear-filled eyes registered that she had reached her goal. A sob escaped her as she clamored to her knees and reached for the thumb latch. It slid aside but the window stubbornly refused to budge. She felt precious breath escape her in a rush. She would not die here. Wrapping the towel around her hand, she put both fists through the glass. It shattered, falling about her in glittering shards. Some bit into the skin of her forearms, others slicing her forehead, sending a warm, wet gush into her eyes. Katniss blotted her face with the remaining towel and used the other to knock out the rest of the glass.

Blessedly cool air, sweet and pure, flowed in from the broken window. She took a moment to breathe deeply, filling her lungs and letting it soothe her flushed face. Keeping one hand pressed firmly against the cut, she draped the towel over the window sill to shield her legs from the few remaining shards. She clattered out on the fire escape and blinked at the cacophony of lights and sirens below. Forms scurried like ants through the chaos as figures stumbled from the building. She let out another sign, realization that help was just a brief climb away steadying her heaving nerves. Just one rung at a time, one floor at a time, she told herself. It will be okay.

Her foot found the first step and then the second. She went slowly, feeling her way from one to the other. The smoke swirled from a few cracked and broken windows but no tongues of flame followed. If she hurried, she could make it as long as the path stayed clear. She curled one hand around a rung and dropped the other to her side, feeling for the comforting bump of the locket in her pocket. Nothing. It wasn't there. She cursed under her breath and searched her pockets again. Still nothing. She looked briefly at the red and blue lights stropping in the distance before climbing back up. She couldn't and wouldn't leave that locket behind. It was the last bits of her family that she had.

She rolled through the window and landed in a sprawling crouch. The haze was thicker and heat clamped down like a vise. She swiped her eyes with the back of her hand, and crawled on hands and knees toward the bedroom. She pressed her face close to the floor, trying to keep beneath the smoke. There was no telltale golden gleam, no sign that the locket was nearby. She began to cough as the acrid odor became more obvious. Blinking rapidly, she covered her mouth with the hem of her shirt. Pushing the door open, she eased inside and looked hastily around but still there was no sign of the locket. No trace. Her heart became a knot that closed off her throat and pushed a trickle of tears from dry, reddened eyes. That was it then. They were gone. She sank down beside the bed and buried her head in her hands. They were gone.

The distant sound of wood breaking registered but she didn't look up. A voice called out, "Is anyone in here?"

She opened her mouth to answer but closed it again just as quickly. Maybe it was time to let go. She had been without them for eleven years. Long enough to forget their faces. Long enough for small details to become hazy and indistinct. Her vision clouded and lost focus as her breathing faded to a raspy wheeze. A black form filled the doorway and she raised a hand to beckon it forward, half thinking that it was her father come to take her home. The form peered through the murk and started as he caught sight of her slumped on the floor. He pushed back his hat and tore the mask from his face as he hurriedly crossed the room and knelt at her side. Unruly, sweat dampened curls plastered themselves to his forehead. Blue eyes narrowed in concern as he covered her face with the mask.

She fought against it at first but then held it to her face as she greedily breathed in cool, dry air. "I'm taking you out of here," he rasped as he lifted her easily and cradled her close. "Hang on to me," he ordered as he made his way swiftly across the living room and out into the mist laden hallway. She sucked in mouthfuls of air as she closed her eyes and sank further into his comforting embrace. The thump-thud of his heart beneath her ear soothed her. She couldn't think anymore, couldn't make herself care. Her family was gone. She mourned them all over again. Darkness beckoned and she fell into it gratefully.

Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxoxoxoxo

Her eyes blinked open and blinked again as she came slowly back to consciousness. The dull rumble of a motor vibrated somewhere close by. Red and blue lights flickered across the dull white ceiling above her. She lifted a hand to her face only to find it swathed in bandages. She could feel another wound tightly around her forehead just above her brow. An IV was taped to the back of her hand and an oxygen mask rested on the pillow nearby.

Memory rolled like distant thunder. Smoke and heat, flames dancing. A blond savior with eyes the color of a clear morning sky. Strong and steady arms that held her close while a gentle voice murmured that she was going to be okay. He would see to that. Nothing could hurt her now.

Katniss pushed herself up and rested her head in her hands. She should find him and thank him for pulling her out. She owed him that much. It had been a long time since she had let a debt go unpaid. She felt a flush burn its way up the back of her neck. She had given up. Had almost thrown everything away because of the locket. Her throat tightened. The locket was gone. The last reminder of them, the last thing she had to remember them by. A soft tap on the ambulance door brought her head around.

He stood, peering up at her in the misty gray light. His pale blond hair still hung in unruly waves over his ears and neck with curls stopping just short of those mesmerizing eyes. A tentative smile pulled up the edges of his mouth as he looked her over. "I wanted to check on you before I headed home," he said softly. "They told me that you were okay but I wanted to see for myself."

"I'm fine," she answered. "Thanks to you. I don't know how I'll ever be able to repay you for what you did."

He waved her words aside and reached into his coat. The light caught on the object in his hand, giving a dull golden gleam. He followed her gaze and extended his arm, fingers unwinding to show a slender chain and locket nestled inside. "I found this by the door as we were leaving. It looked important so I grabbed it. I wanted to make sure you got it back before they took you to the hospital." He reached for her hand and placed the necklace in her upturned palm.

She lowered her eyes to the locket and felt tears gather and fall as she raised it to her lips. She couldn't stop the sob that escaped in a soft exhale as she clutched the locket to her chest. A blurry form swam into view as he knelt before her. "Hey," he asked quietly. "Are you okay?"

She couldn't speak, couldn't move. The comforting weight of the locket in her hand buoyed her courage. That was the only reasonable explanation for what happened next. Her hands found his face and tilted up his chin. His eyes widened as she bent her head and brushed his mouth with hers. She pulled back to gauge his reaction then leaned in again. His lips were warm and alive. They tasted of smoke, ash, and something uniquely him. Her hands slid to his shoulders to pull him closer. His hands found their way around her waist and gathered her in. It wasn't passion or love that fueled their embrace. Gratitude, need, and something warm and giving and right brought them together. His fingers tangled in her hair just as hers found their way into the curls flopping over the collar of his shirt. He pulled away from her mouth to press one last kiss to her forehead. "You have to go," he murmured. "But I'll see you soon. My name's Peeta, by the way. Peeta Mellark."

"Katniss Everdeen," she replied. "Thank you, Peeta. I can't…."

"You don't have to," he said. "I'm just glad that I could be there. You get better and I'll see you soon."

"You promise," she asked softly.

"You'll see me again," he returned. "You're not going to get away from me that easily."

She settled back against the pillows and gave him a tired smile. "Will you come back tomorrow? Stay longer?"

"If that's what you want," he answered. "You get some rest and I'll see you soon."

"See you soon," she repeated and closed her eyes.

Peeta eased the ambulance door closed, and knocked twice. He watched as it rolled away, lights gleaming brightly in the fog. A heavy hand rested on his shoulder and he turned to catch Haymitch's eye. The grizzled captain gave him a knowing look as his shrewd gray eyes darted from the boy to the ambulance passing quickly out of sight. "She was the last one out," Haymitch muttered. "We had stopped looking. She's lucky that you were sent to clear that floor otherwise she might have been left."

Peeta shivered at the thought. "I almost didn't hear her. I don't know what made me go in there. It was almost like something guided me right to her. I can't explain it."

"Don't try to," Haymitch grunted. "Just be thankful that you did. She's alive and that's all that matters. Go on home, kid. You did good."

"Thanks," Peeta murmured and watched as the Captain ambled toward the pod of reporters clamoring for a statement. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath of the cool morning air. He caught a flicker of movement out of the corner of his eye and turned toward it.

A blonde girl in a pink dress stood there smiling as she met his gaze. He smiled back and watched as she turned on her heel and disappeared into the fog.

Peeta felt a shiver go up his spine that had nothing to do with the cold or spent adrenaline. The girl had vanished as if she'd never been. He couldn't explain it nor could he say why she'd made him think of dark-haired Katniss. It was one more oddity in a night filled with them. Something had led him to that apartment. Something told him to go in. He couldn't explain it any more than he could say what made him pick up that locket.

Maybe she would be able to shed some light on it the next time he saw her? He smiled, thinking of the way her lips had felt pressed against his own. He would keep his promise. He would see her again. As he headed toward his car, a girlish laugh echoed in the darkness.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Delivering Fate

Angels deliver Fate to our doorstep - and anywhere else it is needed. ~Jessi Lane Adams

Two weeks passed since the fire and time moved at a glacial pace. Katniss was discharged from the hospital and sent home with a packet of aftercare directives and instructions to return if her symptoms worsened. She snorted under her breath as the nurse pertly informed her that she was free to go. Go where exactly? Home was gone. Soaked and smoke stained remnants were all that remained.

A young girl at the desk looked up and smiled timidly as Katniss shoved the sheaf of papers roughly through the window slot. As she turned away, the girl cleared her throat and said quietly, "There's a place close by that offers temporary housing for folks that need it. Maybe you should try there. They've taken in a few of your neighbors. I think there might still be rooms available if you want to check it out."

Katniss gnawed on her bottom lip as she considered her options. Clearly, she couldn't go back to the apartment. An investigator visited on her first day in the hospital and informed her that she wouldn't be able to return home for the foreseeable future. Without offering any further help, he dropped a card on the bedside table, smiled tightly, and left as quickly as he came. Katniss studied the desk clerk, taking careful note of her understanding gaze and earnest manner. "That sounds like as good a plan as any." A swift glance at her name tag revealed her name. "Thank you for your help, Rue. Do you have the address or a phone number?"

Rue's pleased smile lit up the dingy waiting room. She nodded enthusiastically and bent to do a hasty search of a stuffed cabinet. A triumphant grin wreathed her face as she spun around with a tattered flyer in her hand. Help Our Brethren Mission was embossed on the front page along with an angel drawing. It was pretty despite its simple lines. Katniss couldn't help but be captivated by it. "If you like, I can get you a taxi voucher. We send people to Sae every now and then."

Katniss took the flyer and gave the eager girl an uncomfortable look. "I don't want to cause you any trouble," she muttered. "You've done too much already."

Rue shrugged and withdrew another slip of paper from the overflowing drawer. She handed it to Katniss, picked up the phone and dialed a number from memory. A murmured conversation followed that Katniss could barely hear much less follow. Rue scribbled an illegible note on the pad in front of her, gave a quiet thank you to the person on the line and hung up. "I have a friend who works the desk over at the Hob," she announced. "She said that they still have a few beds so you're in luck. They are sending somebody over to pick you up since it's so late. You can hang out with me until they get her if you want."

Katniss's mouth opened and closed a few times before she gave up and sank into a nearby chair. Rue gave her a sideways glance accompanied by a bashful smile before she greeted the next person in line. Kantiss watched as the girl studiously initialed the forms, made change, and wished the woman a good night. She folded the flyer into a neat square before unraveling it to examine the drawing more closely. The fine lines of the drawing appealed to her. She unwittingly traced them with her finger, lost in thought until Rue quietly cleared her throat. "Your ride's here, Miss Everdeen. You can go right through those doors. You'll see the van parked right outside. It will have the same logo as the flyer so you should recognize it."

Katniss gathered up her meager belongings and climbed to her feet. She looked over her shoulder and met an inquisitive doe brown gaze. She held out her hand and waited until Rue's came up to meet it before whispering, "Thank you. I don't know how I can repay you for all your help."

Rue gave her fingers a quick squeeze before letting go. "You're welcome," she answered. "I'm glad that I could help. If you need anything, here is my extension and what days I work. Call me anytime, okay?"

Katniss took the proffered slip and put it in her pocket. Her fingers found their way to the locket hanging around her neck and curled around the chain. She felt a sense of calm envelop her. Somehow, some way everything was going to be all right. She nodded again and headed for the indicated door. Once through, her gaze swept the few cars parked close by. They honed in on a white Jeep parked beneath a security light just a few feet away. Her breath came out in a long, low sigh at the sight of the stylized angel on the door. Beneath the picture, the word HOB and a phone number was visible. Katniss walked toward the Jeep with slow, measured steps. She berated herself for allowing her nerves to get the better of her. She had no reason whatsoever to be ashamed.

The door swung open and a lithe form slid gracefully to the curb. The woman was on the small side with a willowy figure and wide-set deep brown eyes. She didn't smile as she caught sight of Katniss frozen on the sidewalk. Instead, a wave of annoyance crested on her features before she schooled them to a polite mask. She gestured furiously and yanked the passenger door open as the bewildered girl drew near. "Sae's already got your room ready. Dinner was over hours ago but she fixed up a plate for you. Do you have anything else that I need to get loaded before we take off?" Katniss silently shook her head and climbed inside, the door clipping her heels as the strange woman slammed it shut.

A few moments later, the driver's side door opened and the woman deftly slid in. She buckled the seat belt, flipped on the blinker and scrubbed a hand through her cropped brown hair, leaving it standing on end. She slammed the Jeep in gear and bounded out of the parking space with a screech of rubber on pavement. Katniss grabbed the handle before she could stop herself, only letting go when those brandy colored eyes darted an amused look at her white knuckled grip. "Relax, brainless, I'm not going to get you killed. I may drive a little faster than necessary but I never take risks." A cocky smirk wormed its way onto her face. "Besides, I'm a professional. You can trust me."

Katniss tossed her a skeptical look but released her death grip on the door and folded her hands in her lap. "What exactly do you mean by professional?" she questioned sourly. "And don't call me brainless."

An amused snort escaped the woman, her eyes flicking from the road ahead to Katniss and back again. "I mean that I drag race on the weekends in case you're interested. It's a lot harder to stay alive doing that than it is playing chauffer for little girls like you." She chuckled softly at the disbelieving looks being sent her way. "Besides, Gale says I'm one of the best drivers that he's ever seen. I might even get a sponsor before the Quell."

"Gale?" Katniss asked hesitantly. "Who's that and what is a Quell? I don't know what you're talking about and I don't know you."

She laughed again and gave an exasperated head shake. "Of course you don't know me. I haven't introduced myself yet. I'm Johanna, part time driver and full time second in command at the HOB. Gale is my part time crew chief and full time significant other." She stopped at a red light and tapped her fingers impatiently against the wheel. She didn't look at Katniss but casually continued, "The Quell is the biggest event of the racing season. Drag racing is usually done in quarter mile increments, thus the name. I don't know why they call it a quarter quell. It's been called that as long as I can remember."

Katniss's reply was a dubious nod. She turned her attention to the landscape and breathed a sigh of relief as the light changed. Johanna didn't make any further comments which allowed Katniss to look out the window in relative peace. The quiet ride allowed her to calm her roiling emotions. She decided that tomorrow was soon enough to worry. Tonight, she just wanted a place to curl up and lick her wounds.

They pulled into a graveled drive edged with thick leafed trees. The house was dark except for a low light burning in the front window. The clapboard house seemed massive, sprawling over a large part of the wooded lot. Deep, shady porches surrounded the house on three sides with massive pillars guarding the main entrance. Katniss's jaw dropped as she took it all in. Large ferns hung from cunningly placed hooks between the colonnades. Johanna's lips quirked up but she motioned for Katniss to follow rather than offering a comment.

The door swung open at their approach, and a shadowed form peered into the night. She caught sight of them and stood aside for them to enter. "Took you long enough, girl." Her rough voice had texture. It grated like sand in Katniss's ears. Her gray eyes were still sharp despite the lines surrounding them. They were just a few shades lighter than the tightly coiled bun nestled in the nape of her neck. Despite the hour, she was neatly dressed in shabby but immaculately clean denims and a button up. Steel-rimmed glasses secured by a filigreed chain, dangled at her neck.

She gave Johanna a brief look before turning her searching gaze in Katniss's direction. "You're a pretty little thing, aren't you? Delly told me that you were in the fire over on Twelfth Street. Bad business, that. I hope they put the idiots that started that fire under the jail when they catch them." Sae's firm tones softened as she took in the girl's wan expression and hollow eyes. "You look like you're about to fall over, child. Come on and eat then we'll find you a warm bed. Johanna, you head on home. Thanks for picking her up. Tell Gale that I'll need him to come by tomorrow. I got a message from the boy that he'll be by then to clean out the gutters and paint the shutters upstairs. He'll need somebody to help him."

Johanna nodded and then headed for the door. "I'll let him know. Don't let this one cause you any trouble, Sae. She nearly talked my ear off on the way over." Laughing to herself, she darted out into the night, slamming the door closed behind her.

"That girl," Sae grumbled. She went upstairs instead of toward the back of the house where Katniss assumed the kitchen would be. The hallway was dimly lit by what resembled aisle lighting in a theater. Sae must have sensed her confusion because she commented over her shoulder, "The boy suggested putting them in. I'm not as young as I used to be and, sometimes, we have kids staying here. Kids are always afraid of what they can't see. This old house creaks and groans especially when the wind's up. This seemed like a good fix to both problems. The kids ain't scared and I don't fall on my head going to the necessary." She came to a stop before one of the rooms and eased the door open. "I put you in here, girl. It's not fancy but it's warm and the bed is soft. It was my oldest girl's room." She swung the door wide open and gestured for Katniss to enter.

The room was tucked into the eaves with odd angles and nooks. Katniss's eyes went immediately to a lushly padded window seat inset in the dormer window. A small wicker table sat before it holding a covered tray. A glass and folded napkin sat close by. "I don't know what to say," she whispered.

"Don't say anything then," the woman said kindly. "Eat your dinner and go to bed. There's a bathroom just through there if you want to take a bath before lying down." She indicated another door ingeniously situated in another of the alcoves that dotted the room. "It's not much of a meal, just a sandwich with fruit and cheese but it will tide you over. Breakfast starts at 6am. You come down when you're ready." She sidled to the door and paused with her hand on the knob. "I knew your mama. Lily was a fine woman. She married a good man in Elijah Everdeen. He thought the sun rose just to make her smile. I'm sorry about your family. You're welcome here as long as you like, okay?"

Katniss couldn't speak past the lump in her throat so she nodded mutely and watched as the door slid shut. She forced herself to eat, tears occasionally misting her eyes at memories dredged up by Sae's caring words. Prim's beaming smile and cornflower eyes. Her mother's soft voice and gentle hands. Her father's quiet strength and booming laugh. She missed them tonight more than she thought possible. Her fingers found the locket and twisted the hidden latch. They smiled back at her, beloved and precious despite being faded and worn. She had come so close to losing them all over again. If not for chance and Peeta Mellark, this last bit of them would be gone. He hadn't come by the hospital like he promised so she never got to thank him properly. In the morning, she would remedy that. Tonight, she burrowed into lavender scented blankets, closed her eyes, and dreamed that she was home.

Xoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

The sun shone brightly, buttery golden light pooling on the floor with a few errant rays sprawling over the bed. She rose up on one elbow and looked blearily around the room. Judging by the dull ache in her limbs and the angle of light through the window, it was much later than she usually awoke. She eased her legs over the side of the bed and climbed shakily to her feet. Twenty minutes later, she made her way downstairs and paused in the entryway unsure where to go or what to do. Rather than waffle in indecision, she chose a door at random and hoped that it was the right one.

The tempting smell of warm bread wafted in from the back of the house. Katniss entered and gave Sae a timid smile as the woman turned toward the sound of the door opening. Sae didn't speak but gestured toward the sideboard containing a few pans on warming trays along with a bowl of fresh fruit and a pitcher of orange juice still frosted from the fridge.

Katniss grinned at the back of the woman's head, appreciating her no nonsense attitude. She picked up a plate and cutlery. She then filled it with fluffy scrambled eggs, bacon, and home fries. She rounded off the plate with a couple of biscuits still warm from the oven. Sae opened the refrigerator and pulled out a jar of homemade strawberry jam. "Try this. I made it with berries from the garden. The view is pretty from the porch this time of day. Why don't you give it a look and I'll bring you some juice."

Katniss sat her plate down and opened the jar, then spread the jam generously over her biscuits. She retraced her steps to the front door and elbowed her way through the screen and out into the spring scented air. The porch was dotted with rockers and wicker furniture. There was a small bistro table tucked neatly into the curve of the porch with four chairs flanking it. She laid her plate on the table and pulled out the chair that gave an unimpeded view of the rolling lawn and forest beyond. Sae came out a few moments later with a tall glass of juice and plunked it down beside the plate. She patted Katniss's shoulder and went back inside without a word.

Breakfast was eaten in fits and starts as new details of the view caught her eye. The tale-tale flash of sunlight on water hinted at the presence of a lake or pond near the tree line. She made a mental note to walk down a little while later. An old rock fence marked the yard's boundaries. Moss and lichen softened the harshness of the limestone. It gave a rustic feel to the simple elegance of the house. She polished off the last few bites of her breakfast and settle back in her chair, letting her gaze run lazily over the yard. It was lovely here. As much as she wanted to go home, this place was a balm to the battered pieces of her soul. It wrapped around her like a warm blanket. The feeling was almost perfect…almost. A persistent banging just out of sight kept it from reaching nirvana.

At first, she was able to tune it out. After a few minutes, she couldn't help but hear it. Before long, annoyance set in. She plunked the glass heavily on the table and rose to her feet. Rather than carry the dishes inside, she followed the porch around the sweep of the house. As she rounded the bend, the noise grew louder. The porch ended abruptly in a cul-de-sac that was normally filled with a wicker loveseat and a pair of glass-topped tables. Those had been pushed aside. A ladder was propped against the outer railing, using it as a brace and an anchor. An immaculate pair of sneakers occupied the step a few inches below the balustrade. She froze at the sight of them, and then gaped as her eyes traced a pair of legs encased in tattered yet well-fitting jeans. The banging abruptly ceased as a hiss of pain followed by an audible curse was heard. She winced sympathetically.

"Must have hurt," an unexpected voice murmured near her ear. "He usually doesn't cuss where Sae might hear him. She's death on bad manners, especially cussing."

Katniss jumped as she wheeled to face the voice. A pair of amused brown eyes met her gaze expectantly. "Shit," she breathed. "Do you always sneak up on people?"

Johanna shrugged and laughed again. "Not usually. I figured you'd make it worth the effort." She gestured toward the ladder. "Aren't you going to say hi? Rumor has it that you two are old friends."

Katniss 's brow furrowed as her eyes darted from the half-hidden form to grinning Johanna and back again. "Old friends? What do you mean?"

Her smile widened and instead of answering directly, Johanna called playfully, "Hey, Blondie, quit trying to nail your thumb to the side of the house and come say hello. From what Gale tells me, you two are long overdue." A tousled head of damp blond waves dropped into view as he crouched down. His blue eyes immediately found her and latched on. She felt a wave of pink-tinged heat suffuse her cheeks at his unblinking look. Johanna, however, appeared pleased as punch with his reaction. She snorted under her breath as they continued to stare at each other. Shoving her hands into her pockets, Johanna murmured, "I have to go make a few calls. You two have fun. Don't do anything I wouldn't do."

"That's not saying much," Peeta returned, his eyes never leaving Katniss. Johanna snorted again and walked away leaving the two of them uncomfortably eying the other. "When did you get here?" he asked softly. "I had no idea."

Katniss shifted from foot-to-foot as she avoided his bright-eyed gaze. She found it difficult to look at him without remembering their spontaneous kiss and the promise he had so earnestly given then tossed aside. She couldn't help but wonder why he hadn't come to see her. She didn't know him but something made her trust him, believe him when he told her that everything was going to be okay. The silence stretched out between them, unblemished and untouched. Peeta eased a leg over the railing and dropped lightly onto the porch. He slid a bare arm over his forehead, pushing damp locks away from his face.

"I did stop by," he murmured, watching her closely. "I came to the hospital twice. The first time, you were sleeping and I didn't want to wake you because the nurse on your floor said that you hadn't been sleeping well. The second time, your room was empty. They said that you had been taken down for lab work. I was going to wait but got sent out to a fire. I called but you'd been discharged and nobody knew where you'd gone. How'd you hear about Sae's?"

She worried her bottom lip as her eyes wandered over him, taking in messy blond curls, cornflower blue eyes, and a firmly muscled chest. She realized that she was staring and hurriedly dropped her gaze to the worn boards of the porch. "They didn't tell me about the visits," she muttered. "I wanted to thank you for what you did, for getting me out of there. " She fidgeted with the necklace hanging loosely around her neck. "I went back for this," she confided. "When I couldn't find it right away, I didn't know what to do. It was like losing them all over again." She cradled the locket lovingly. "This was my sister's. I gave it to her for her birthday a few months before the crash happened." An uncomfortable lull in the conversation followed as both of them searched for something to say. Desperately, she reached for the first topic that came to mind. "You asked how I heard about this place. There was a girl at the hospital that called and arranged for me to come. I had no idea this place even existed. What are you doing here?"

Peeta shrugged as he pulled a ragged t-shirt over his head and then settled back against the railing. "Sae's my aunt by marriage. She's been a volunteer for as long as I can remember. This place has been in her family since forever. When she got the idea of taking in boarders, Gale and I got recruited as ad-hoc maintenance men and gardeners. You'll see him around eventually. He's here on his days off almost as much as I am." He offered her a crooked grin as he climbed to his feet. "I'd better get back to those shutters. Sae will have my head if they're not done."

Katniss nodded and reluctantly retraced her steps so that she could gather up the dishes from her abandoned breakfast. An ideas struck her, the very thought sending a shiver dancing its way up her spine. Before she could talk herself out of it, she leaned over the railing and craned her neck until she could see his face. "Peeta," she called hesitantly. He turned toward her with a ready grin and a brow lifted inquiringly. "I was wondering if you could show me around after you're done. If you're busy, I can wander around on my own. I just thought it would be nice to have company."

The smile he sent her was blinding in its intensity, almost like staring into the sun. She ignored the galloping lurch her heart gave in response, choosing instead to stare at the flecks of peeling paint gracing the shabby railing. "I'd like that," he said warmly. "I should be done by no later than 2pm. We can meet out here and decide where we're going. Does that sound okay?"

A small smile touched her lips as she gave a self-conscious nod, "It sounds great. I'll see you then."  
"See you," he echoed, giving a small wave when she flicked a glance at him over her shoulder as she made her way into the house.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO  
That walk led to another, which led to lunch on the porch and a fishing trip to the lake. Sae adopted her after a fashion and Katniss soon found herself assigned chores and to do lists much like Peeta, Gale and Johanna. She didn't have the heart to tell the woman no since Sae had taken her in with little notice and welcomed her with open arms.

A floppy hat in an appalling shade of orange shaded her from the summer sun as she used a long handled fork to loosen clumps of dirt and dig out the more stubborn weeds that found their way into Sae's herb patch. Across the yard, Gale and Peeta were bent over Sae's ancient mower with the hood up in a futile attempt to coax the beleaguered motor to life. Peeta caught her eye and tossed her an amused grin. She smiled back and shook her head at their stubborn refusal to admit defeat. The mower was on its last legs but none of them would admit it.

The mower gave a coughing gasp as it whined to life. It stuttered and stammered for an instant before dying in a haze of gasoline and smoke. Fiery Gale's curses could be heard the length and breadth of the lawn. Peeta, however, only waved a hand in front of his face before kneeling down to finger a line skirting the edge of the mower. He bent closer, then laughed and nudged Gale with his elbow. The dark-haired man scoffed but bent to get a closer look. His stunned expression was priceless even from where Katniss sat. She couldn't tell what they'd found but within moments, the low drone of a perfectly working engine could be heard. Katniss chuckled softly as she watched them exchange bemused looks before dropping the hood. They were clearly dubious of the mower's reliability but it appeared that they'd decided not to look a gift horse in the mouth. Katniss shook her head and turned back to her weeding. It wasn't a matter of if when it came to the mower breaking down again; more like when.

She finished weeding the last row of thyme and sat down in the grass, lifting a lukewarm bottle of water to her lips. She leaned back on her palms, the bottle resting in the cool green grass beside her and stared unseeing at the blue expanse of sky. The whispering rasp of grass rustling was her only hint that she was no longer alone. She straightened as Sae appeared, holding a tall glass of lemonade weeping with beads of condensation.

"I thought you might be needing this," The old woman growled. "You make sure to keep your head covered with that hat too, little girl. Sunburn is nothing to play around with. You've been lucky before now."

Rather than argue, Katniss pulled the brim down until it shadowed most of her face. Satisfied, Sae covered her eyes with her free hand and peered toward the pair still grappling with the mower. "Looks like that's about ready for the scrap heap," she observed, her hand falling limply to her side. "I'll have Gale haul it away. No point in trying to fix it. I've practically rebuilt the damned thing over the years. It's just a matter of time before it quits for good."

Katniss's jaw dropped at the blunt pronouncement. Before she could stop herself, she blurted out, "Why did you let them waste all that time and effort if you knew it wouldn't do any good?"

Sae shrugged noncommittally. "For the same reason I let you use that fork instead of using the tiller in the storage shed. Sometimes, you just have to let folks go about things in their own way and at their own pace. So long as the work gets done and the person is happy, that's all that matters." She didn't seem to expect an answer so Katniss didn't give her one. After a few minutes, Sae's probing gaze fell back to the girl still reclined in the dirt. "He's a good boy. You could do much worse, you know."

Katniss's startled look was met and stalled by a curious pair of pewter gray eyes. "I don't understand," she mumbled. "What do you mean I could do worse?'

Sae huffed in annoyance and rapped Katniss on the top of the head with a folded fist. "Don't be dense, girl. It doesn't suit you. He likes you. Any fool can see that. If I was you, I'd snap him up right quick. Peeta deserves somebody that will appreciate him. If you're anything like your mama, you're smart enough not to let a good thing pass you by."

Katniss's gaze followed Sae's to where the two men were still absorbed in the mower's inner workings. She was immediately caught up in the way his disheveled curls fell over his forehead making him look younger than his twenty-five years. His hands made graceful arcs as he talked, using his gestures as much as his words to get his point across. If the considering expression on Gale's face was anything to go by, Peeta had the right idea. It was how to put it into action that seemed to be causing the trouble. "I owe him," she muttered. "I owe him more than I can ever repay, Sae. He deserves somebody who can make him happy, not a broken shell of a girl that he saved once upon a time."

Sae mumbled under her breath and rapped the girl sharply on the head once more with a rough hand. "I won't hear that kind of talk, girl. You stop that right now, you hear. I've known that boy his whole life. There's not a bigger heart to be found anywhere. Sometimes, I worry that his heart is too big and has too much goodness in it. The world isn't kind to people like that. It wrings them out, uses them up if it can. He's had his fair share of trouble but it didn't break him. He still smiles despite everything." Noting Katniss's curious look, Sae let out a sigh. "I've said too much as usual. It's a failing of mine. It's not my place to tell you about the boy. I'll leave that up to him. I'll just say that his mama was a selfish woman who took her disappointment out on everyone around her, Peeta most of all. Getting a divorce was the smartest thing my brother, Pryce, ever did." The old woman's hand pushed the vile orange hat back and gently straightened the fraying braid. "You have a missing piece, girl. I can see it and so can the boy. You lost the people you love most in the world. It's a hard thing to keep living when they're gone and you miss them. The thing to remember is that there are others to love. You just have to be strong enough to let them in."

Katniss bit back tears as she met the woman's gentle gaze. She let out a shaky breath before nodding silently. Sae patted her shoulder affectionately and then stepped back. "Get along with you then. Weeding won't finish itself." With that, she strolled toward the house without a backwards glance.  
Katniss turned the words over in her mind, her hand unconsciously toying with the locket hanging around her neck. She could feel the truth in those words. Others to love. Maybe Sae was right. Maybe it was time to start living again. The wind flipped her braid, feeling for all the world like her mother's fingers moving softly through her hair. The sun beat down, its warmth surrounding her like her father's arms had as a child. Her eyes met Peeta's across the expanse of lawn separating them and he smiled. She smiled back before she could help herself, feeling foolish at the giddy pleasure sending tendrils of heat swirling through her belly. As he turned back to the mower, a pensive frown creased her brow. Prim could pull a smile from her without even trying. She could make Katniss believe that things could always be good again no matter what. According to Sae, Peeta had the the same hopeful view.

Katniss laughed softly under her breath. Hope. She barely knew the meaning of the word. Survive. That was something she understood, something she excelled at. She was good at surviving. Prim had been good at living. She supposed that Peeta was too. Could she trust him enough to let him in? Would he stay? She didn't know but suddenly she decided she wanted to find out. Climbing to her feet, she dusted her hands off on the legs of her jeans before striding purposefully toward him.

The breeze kicked up as she crossed the yard, causing the wind chimes to clink together. Their music filled the up the late afternoon. Sae paused to listen, an appreciative smile worming its way onto her face. The simple tune waxed and waned with the shifting wind...it sounded like joy. It sounded like laughter. It sounded like home.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Coming Full Circle

Angels have no philosophy but love. - Terri Guillemets

She never intended to become a permanent resident at the Hob. It just sort of worked out that way. Some days, she compares the Mission to a black hole, a force of nature from which there is no escape. Other days, she is thankful because it's the closest thing she has to a home and family. She never meant to stay. That's the part that shocks her more than anything.

The days run together, moments melding and mixing until they are indistinguishable. What should have been weeks only turns into months. She asks herself where the time went and how she ended up in this place. She finds no satisfactory answer. She tells herself not to question it, to chalk it up to guardian angels sending good fortune her way. The part of her that knows what it means to see everything good taken away can't help but wonder when this too will fall by the way. She knows how to be alone. She knows how to get by. This is something entirely new. This—whatever this is-she has nothing to compare it to.

Sae has become more like a mother than a friend. She never stints on giving advice or her opinion whether wanted or not. She watches over those she deems family with the single-minded determination. Heaven help those who hurt one she considers her own. Katniss has long since discovered that it's easier to go along to get along when it comes to Sae. Once taken under her wing, it's a life sentence. There is no early release for good behavior.

Johanna is a trusted friend and adversary. Conversations with her are more like battles than exchanges of information. Coming out of them bloody and bruised is the best that can be hoped for. Blunt to a fault, contrary and perverse, willful and strong-willed. She is the older sister that Katniss never wanted but now can't imagine doing without. She is as much like Prim as a cactus is like a rose. There is no common thread and yet she finds it difficult to think of one without the other coming to mind. One is a sister by blood, the other by circumstance.

And then there is Peeta Mellark. She keeps a list of words to try to figure out who and what he is to her: friend, savior, confidant, ally, cohort, life line. Any and all of them fit depending on the day and context. If asked, she would call him good. That's the word that ultimately comes to mind…he's so good. Sometimes, she doesn't feel worthy of the looks she catches him turning her way. He looks at her like she hung the moon. She knows it's not real, that she's more apt to make a star fall than light up the sky. He only shakes his head, smiling softly whenever she points out this inevitable truth to him. "You don't know the effect you have," he whispers, color riding high in his cheeks. "You're more than you think you are."

"What does that even mean?" she asks, almost thinking she knows but scared as always that she's aiming too high and, because of that, will most certainly fall.

"Figure it out," he predictably replies. "I'll confirm or deny, Katniss. You'll have to work the rest out on your own."

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The first time he held her hand was on the fourth of July. The night was hot and muggy with a million stars reflecting off the still waters of the lake. The campfire had burned down to gray-orange embers, the acrid scent of smoke hanging heavy in the air.

She stood back from the crackling blaze, her jaw tense and tight. Johanna took one look at her face and quickly bit off the stinging remark she was about to let loose. Instead, she grabbed another sharpened stick and put it in the fire beside her own. Katniss gave her a weak grin when Johanna handed her a plate a few moments later.

Peeta watched the exchange from the shoreline, his face expressionless in the flame-kissed dark. He made his way to her side, a warm solid presence that soothed as much as it comforted. She wanted him close, needed it even if she couldn't say the words out loud. He seemed to know even without her asking because he didn't go further than arm's reach the rest of the evening. When the fireworks started, she felt his hand slip into hers. As their fingers twined together, she finally found the courage to meet his gaze. The sparks and flashes lighting up the dark had nothing on the warmth that engulfed her at the look in his eyes. He smiled and gave their joined hands a reassuring squeeze before tilting his head back to the blooming sky. She closed hers and focused on how impossibly perfect his hand felt in hers, dreading the moment she would have to let go.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO XOXOXO

The first time he hugged her was on a Tuesday. Sae dropped a pair of gardening gloves in her lap during breakfast with a gruff order to see to the flower beds flanking the porch. Katniss rolled her eyes at the woman's back and stuck out her tongue just as Peeta wandered in to grab a bite before he started his shift. Her quelling glare quickly stifled his laughter along with any questions about what prompted such a display. Embarrassment, not anger, turned her cheeks a becoming shade of pink. She hurriedly finished her meal, and then yanked on the gloves as she rushed headlong for the door. His hand on her arm stopped her in her tracks. His blue eyes alight with laughter and something she had no name for mesmerized her, held her spellbound as he pulled her in and wrapped her up tight. Her curves fit his lines as if they were two pieces specially made to fit together.

"If you hate it that much, just tell her no," he murmured into her hair.

"I don't hate it," she breathed him in— cinnamon, dill and something uniquely him. "I just don't like it much."

His arms tightened ever so slightly. "Thanks for clearing that up," he remarked playfully. "I would never have figured that out on my own."

She leaned her head back to meet his gaze and mumbled softly, "You shouldn't laugh at me, you know. It's not very nice."

His mouth tilted into a grin despite his apologetic expression. "I'm sorry, Katniss."

She suppressed the urge to smile back, instead gifting him with her customary scowl. Her brow furrowed in confusion as his smile broadened at the sight of her stern face. She pulled reflexively away and muttered under her breath. "I don't understand you."

He let her go, his hand lingering on her braid as he slowly backed away. "It's not that hard to figure out."

Her breath left in a ragged hiss. "Maybe not for you but I'm no good at this stuff."

He gave disbelieving snort as he turned to the sideboard and began to fill his plate. "Don't worry about it. I'm sure it will come to you eventually."

She tucked the gloves into her back pocket, gave him another scowl for good measure and stalked out the door. It was only when she was out of sight that she let out the breath she'd been holding. "It already has, Peeta. I just don't know how to say it yet."

XOXOXOXOXOOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX O

The first time he kissed her was on a Thursday during the worst storm the town had seen in ten years. Thunder muttered in the distance and the air was full of waiting. Something momentous was about to happen and the world held its breath. Once upon a time, she'd loved storms but that time had long since passed. These days, she sought distraction or, better yet oblivion. Anything would do as long as it pulled her mind elsewhere.

It started off slow, a misty rain and a freshening wind. Lightning flashed-white fire that lit up the sky-followed by the cannon's boom of thunder. She couldn't stop a shiver and indrawn breath as the storm rolled on in earnest. It pelted the earth unforgivingly as it turned from a shower to a flood. Huddled in an armchair, she didn't see him enter until he knelt before her and gently clasped her hands.

"It's okay," he murmured, noting her pale cheeks and wide, worried eyes. "You're safe. I've got you."

She managed a distracted smile, her gaze inextricably drawn to the window where the storm raged unabated. "Look at me," he cajoled as his fingers tipped up her chin. "Listen to me, Katniss. I'm here. You're safe."

Her eyes darted up to meet his only to move immediately back to the window. His hand cupped her cheek, tilting her head as his lips found hers. A second stretched out to eternity as her mind struggled to process exactly what was happening. Her pulse pounded in her ears, drowning out the distant thunder. Strong fingers held her steady while the world heaved beneath her feet. She remembered the way he tasted from that ill-conceived kiss in the ambulance a lifetime ago. The way he groaned as she angled her head to seal their mouths more tightly together. The solid feel of him surrounding her, as if nothing could reach her as long as she was in his arms.

He pulled away only to drop softer, lighter touches on the tip of her nose, the center of her forehead, her closed eyes, and the palm of her hand still clasped within his own. "You don't have to be afraid. If you believe nothing else, believe that."

"You don't have to protect me," she whispered.

"We'll protect each other," he countered. "That is, if you'll allow it."

Her answer echoed her request from another mist filled night, "Will you stay?"

"Of course," his smile was luminous. "Always."

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Three words. Three. Little. Words. She couldn't count how many times she heard them. In the morning as she drank her first cup of coffee with sleepy eyes and tousled hair, whispered in her ear before nodding off each night and at odd moments in between. He made it look so easy. She often found herself with the words on the tip of her tongue, but try as she might...she couldn't say them out loud until a balmy, bathwater day in August when she couldn't get them out fast enough.

Sae hosted an annual end of summer picnic for the local kids. The Hob employees were usually called upon to man activity stations, organize games, and dish out copious amounts of food. Katniss ended up

helping with the ball toss and running an archery booth on the side. Just across the yard, Peeta presided over an extravaganza of water coloring and chalk drawings. Judging from the amount of noise wafting from that direction, it was a great success. Taking advantage of a lull, Katniss made her way over to view the artwork and to catch a glimpse of the teacher.

He was stretched out full length with his head almost touching that of the small girl's next to him. Dark braids tied with dainty pink bows swung on either side of an angelic face. Her little brow was scrunched in concentration, the tip of her tongue barely visible as she concentrated on shading a lopsided blossom to her satisfaction. She beamed as Peeta murmured approvingly and then giggled when he sketched a bumble bee crawling along one velvety petal.

Katniss stopped a knot in her throat at the sight of them. Something about it seemed so right and real. Longing for something she never knew she wanted filled her up to overflowing. To those watching her watching him, it was written all over her face.

Peeta glanced up and grinned as he caught sight of her standing frozen just steps away. "Hey," he said brightly. "Did you come to help us draw? I'm sure Posy wouldn't mind sharing her chalk, would you?"

The little girl enthusiastically agreed. Unable to resist, Katniss joined them. "You can draw here," Posy chimed in helpfully. "Use my blue." The two of them went to work on the flower; Posy supervising as Katniss obediently used the blue chalk to fill in the remaining blooms.

Her eyes met Peeta's over Posy's head and before she knew it, the words tumbled out. "I love you."

For a man known for his golden tongue, the stunned silence following her confession should have been comical. For a woman known for keeping her cards close to her vest, her shocked expression was priceless. Typically, Peeta recovered first but the only word he could manage was a choked off "What?"

Katniss opened and closed her mouth a few times before covering it with a shaking hand. "I didn't...that is, I didn't mean to say...what I meant was..."

He sat up abruptly, eager eyes fixed on her face. "What did you mean, Katniss?"

She closed her eyes, inwardly cursing her stupidity for blurting it out like that. When she opened them, all she could see was the hopeful smile on his face. That more than anything sealed her fate. She gave him a tentative smile in return and there was no hesitation as she repeated firmly, "I love you."

Whatever he meant to say in reply was lost as Posy gave them a mutinous look. "I want to draw," she demanded.

They both turned their attention back to the girl and her drawing. Still, his hand found its way into hers. His smile mirrored hers. His mouthed "love you back" said everything she needed to hear.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

They were married on a Saturday in spring beneath a blooming apple tree surrounded by family and friends. The bride wore two pieces of jewelry in addition to her silk and lace. One was her pearl engagement ring which hadn't left her hand since the night he placed it on her finger with kiss to seal the promise. The other was a battered gold locket, all that was left of her family. It was her something old and something borrowed because, to her, it would always belong to Prim.

As she stood to speak, her fingers found the locket and clutched it tightly as she always did when things seemed too much to bear. "I wish they could be here today," she said softly. "I know they'd be happy." She had to stop when the tears came and could no longer speak past the lump in her throat. Peeta was at her side in a moment—his arms as always her refuge from the world. More than one pair of eyes misted as they watched the exchange. When the bride moved to continue, the groom stayed at her side.

"I lost everything in an instant. I lost myself." She dropped her gaze to the locket, her voice frayed and breaking. "It was easier to survive alone than to live and try to love." Her eyes found Sae's. "Thank you for taking me in when I had nowhere else to go." To Johanna, "Thank you for being my friend and for kicking my ass when I needed it." To Rue, "Thank you for helping me find my way home." To Peeta, "Thank you for loving me and for letting me love you." She opened the locket and stared down at their much-loved faces. "I miss you and love you every day."

Raising her head, Katniss gasped as she glimpsed a blonde girl at the edge of the crowd, her hair a wrist thick rope down her back. Her blue eyes danced as she looked lovingly back, a brilliant smile lighting her face. "Prim," The single word fell from her lips as she took an involuntary step forward, hands raised in mute appeal. The specter seemed to pause, and then touched three fingers to its lips before she faded from view.

The feel of Peeta's hands brought her back. She turned into him and let his arms enfold her. "You okay?" he breathed.

She tucked her head into his shoulder, his heart beating steadily beneath her ear. "Better than okay," she murmured. "I'm home."

It ends….thank you for reading.

Salanderjade


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